My hero George Carlin has died

[Robert Ingersoll]

George Carlin, funny man that he was, had the great honor to be American's greatest commentator on religion in the last decade or so of his life. Last Tuesday, he was awarded the 11th annual Mark Twain Award for Humor by PBS, a fitting final tribute to a man who, like my namesake on another board like this, had no love of superstition & its effects on society. Said Carlin in 2004: "The whole problem with this idea of obscenity and indecency, and all of these things — bad language and whatever — it's all caused by one basic thing, and that is: religious superstition. There's an idea that the human body is somehow evil and bad and there are parts of it that are especially evil and bad, and we should be ashamed. Fear, guilt and shame are built into the attitude toward sex and the body. . . .It's reflected in these prohibitions and these taboos that we have."

I'll miss not having new material from George, but relish the fact that his corpus of work is so deep that we can collectively mine it for centuries to come. I'll really miss, though, having George around to put current events into their proper perspective. He never missed a chance to point out a simple fact that the vast majority of Americans often missed: the emperor wears no clothes. Much like his disdain for the religious, he also thought conservatives & Republicans were schmucks for believing in a morally bankrupt ideology. Some of us are simpy built without the myopia button. I'm like that, and George was definitely like that. We see it as it is, and tell it like it is. And if the establishment don't like it, well, in the words of George Carlin, "fuck 'em."

Rest in pieces, George. You've earned a well-deserved dirtnap with the worms. Because as you & I both know, this life is all we get so you'd better make the most of it. I'd say you did just that, in spades.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080623/..._george_carlin

[Hog Trash]

Knowing I will once again be labeled a "Jesus Nut" I will defend religion. Well, simply put it's not religion it's just how some people try to interpret what they believe God expects of us. Right or wrong they do what they think is right. Sometimes morality has nothing to do with religion. I personally believe that many people who are not in the least bit religious might find Mr Carlin some what offensive. I to enjoyed the wit and humor of George Carlin and will miss him. My hero, Benjamin Franklyn, is also dead.

[Robert Ingersoll]

Well, I liked Franklin too. As well as Jefferson, Madison, & Paine. None of them were particularly religious, and Paine was overtly hostile to it. America has a long list of religious agitators----Paine, Ingersoll, Twain, Mencken, & in our lifetime, Carlin. So who takes his place? I'd say Bill Maher's upcoming documentary Religulous puts him in the lead.

[Robert Ingersoll]

Some of my favorite George Carlin material:

I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood.
-- George Carlin (attributed: source unknown)

I credit that eight years of grammar school with nourishing me in a direction where I could trust myself and trust my instincts. They gave me the tools to reject my faith. They taught me to question and think for myself and to believe in my instincts to such an extent that I just said, "This is a wonderful fairy tale they have going here, but it's not for me."
-- George Carlin, in the New York Times, August 20, 1995

If churches want to play the game of politics, let them pay admission like everyone else.
-- George Carlin (attributed: source unknown)

Religion: If this [word] offends you, welcome to the world of sane and realistic critical thought. More harm has been done to the collective human psyche by religion than by all the fucking and cocksucking since the dawn of time. By the way, many religious people (including the ordained) fuck and suck each other's cocks all the time.
-- George Carlin, from the language warning sequence introducing the his website, www.geogrecarlin.com, that existed in late 2001 and early 2002

Instead of school busing and prayer in schools, which are both controversial, why not a joint solution? Prayer in buses. Just drive these kids around all day and let them pray their fuckn' empty little heads off.
-- George Carlin, Brain Droppings

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
-- George Carlin (attributed: source unknown)

We created god in our own image and likeness!
-- George Carlin (attributed: source unknown)

I finally accepted Jesus -- not as my personal savior, but as a man I intend to borrow money from.
-- George Carlin, Brain Droppings

I've begun worshipping the Sun for a number of reasons. First of all, unlike some other gods I could mention, I can see the Sun. It's there for me every day. And the things it brings me are quite apparent all the time: heat, light, food, a lovely day. There's no mystery, no one asks for money, I don't have to dress up, and there's no boring pageantry. And interestingly enough, I have found that the prayers I offer to the sun and the prayers I formerly offered to God are all answered at about the same 50-percent rate.
-- George Carlin, Brain Droppings

Here's another question I've been pondering -- what is all this shit about angels? Have you heard this? Three out of four people belive in angels. Are you fucking stupid? Has everybody lost their mind? You know what I think it is? I think it's a massive, collective, psychotic chemical flashback for all the drugs smoked, swallowed, shot, and obsorbed rectally by all Americans from 1960 to 1990. Thirty years of street drugs will get you some fucking angels, my friend!
-- George Carlin (attributed: source unknown)

What about Goblins, huh? Doesn't anybody belive in Goblins? You never hear about this. Except on Halloween and then it's all negative shit. And what about Zombies? You never hear from Zombies! That's the trouble with Zombies, they're unreliable! I say if you're going to go for the Angel bullshit you might as well go for the Zombie package as well.
-- George Carlin, You Are All Diseased

I don't have any beliefs or allegiances. I don't believe in this country, I don't believe in religion, or a god, and I don't believe in all these man-made institutional ideas.
-- George Carlin, quoted from Reuters / Variety "Notable Quotes" for April 25, 2001

I have as much authority as the Pope, I just don't have as many people who believe it.
-- George Carlin, Brain Droppings

This is a little prayer dedicated to the separation of church and state. I guess if they are going to force those kids to pray in schools they might as well have a nice prayer like this: Our Father who art in heaven, and to the republic for which it stands, thy kingdom come, one nation indivisible as in heaven, give us this day as we forgive those who so proudly we hail. Crown thy good into temptation but deliver us from the twilight's last gleaming. Amen and Awomen.
-- George Carlin, Saturday Night Live

The two big mistakes were the belief in a sky god -- that there's a man in the sky with 10 things he doesn't want you to do and you'll burn for a long time if you do them -- and private property, which I think is at the core of our failure as a species. That's the source of my indignations, my dissatisfactions, however it comes out on the stage. I feel betrayed by the people I'm part of, these creatures, these magnificent creatures.
-- George Carlin, Orange County Register, March 1997

We use up words like "spiritual" so fast in this culture. Twenty years ago "spiritual" had a distinct meaning. But now there's a lot of jack-off thinkers who just love to talk about the spiritual. And there is a lot of bogus -- is "bogosity" a word? It should be -- a lot of bogosity in these spiritual seekers. So you have to find another way to express it. I just call it "how I fit."
-- George Carlin, Orange County Register, March 1997

In the Bullshit Department, a businessman can't hold a candle to a clergyman. 'Cause I gotta tell you the truth, folks. When it comes to bullshit, big-time, major league bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims: religion. No contest. No contest. Religion. Religion easily has the greatest bullshit story ever told.
Think about it. Religion has actually convinced people that there's an invisible man -- living in the sky -- who watches everything you do, every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a special list of ten things he does not want you to do. And if you do any of these ten things, he has a special place, full of fire and smoke and burning and torture and anguish, where he will send you to live and suffer and burn and choke and scream and cry forever and ever 'til the end of time!
But He loves you.
He loves you, and He needs money! He always needs money! He's all-powerful, all-perfect, all-knowing, and all-wise, somehow just can't handle money! Religion takes in billions of dollars, they pay no taxes, and they always need a little more. Now, you talk about a good bullshit story. Holy Shit!
-- George Carlin Politically Incorrect, May 29, 1997

You know who I pray to? Joe Pesci. Joe Pesci. Two reasons; first of all, I think he's a good actor. Okay. To me, that counts. Second; he looks like a guy who can get things done. Joe Pesci doesn't fuck around. Doesn't fuck around. In fact, Joe Pesci came through on a couple of things that God was having trouble with. For years I asked God to do something about my noisy neighbor with the barking dog. Joe Pesci straightened that cock-sucker out with one visit.
I noticed that of all the prayers I used to offer to God, and all the prayers that I now offer to Joe Pesci, are being answered at about the same 50 percent rate. Half the time I get what I want. Half the time I don't. Same as God 50-50. Same as the four leaf clover, the horse shoe, the rabbit's foot, and the wishing well. Same as the mojo man. Same as the voodoo lady who tells your fortune by squeezing the goat's testicles. It's all the same; 50-50. So just pick your superstitions, sit back, make a wish and enjoy yourself.
And for those of you that look to the Bible for it's literary qualities and moral lessons; I got a couple other stories I might like to recommend for you. You might enjoy The Three Little Pigs. That's a good one. It has a nice happy ending. Then there's Little Red Riding Hood. Although it does have that one X-rated part where the Big Bad Wolf actually eats the grandmother. Which I didn't care for, by the way. And finally, I've always drawn a great deal of moral comfort from Humpty Dumpty. The part I liked best: "and all the king's horses, and all the king's men couldn't put Humpty together again." That's because there is no Humpty Dumpty, and there is no God. None. Not one. Never was. No God.
-- George Carlin (attributed: source unknown)

If this is the best God can do, I'm not impressed.
-- George Carlin, Napalm & Silly Putty (2001)

I think it's the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.
-- George Carlin, appearing on A&E Biography

[Frankg]

I remeber the first time on saw him on the Ed Sullivan show he was doing the hippie dippie weather man and I was laughing so hard my my stomach started to hurt , I was lucky enough to see him in concert 3 times.

It is definetly a sad day.

[Bill]

The youtube video they were playing on cnn was pretty funny - about how the mess in government is the respnsibility of the fucktards who vote in the crooked and incompetent pols.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0u6lCBnRoHQ

"If you have selfish ignorant citizens, you are gonna have selfish ignorant leaders...".

[Robert Ingersoll]

"If you have selfish ignorant citizens, you are gonna have selfish ignorant leaders...".

His true genius was pointing out the obvious.

[Binky]

Knowing I will once again be labeled a "Jesus Nut" I will defend religion. Well, simply put it's not religion it's just how some people try to interpret what they believe God expects of us. Right or wrong they do what they think is right. Sometimes morality has nothing to do with religion. I personally believe that many people who are not in the least bit religious might find Mr Carlin some what offensive. I to enjoyed the wit and humor of George Carlin and will miss him. My hero, Benjamin Franklyn, is also dead.


While Bengamin Franklin was a great stateman and all that went with it, he was in fact, a terrible husband and father. He and his wife stayed married for years and years, and had a son and a daughter, but due to circumstances, it was a marriage of distance. He resided for years in France while she lived in the states. When his son reached adulthood, Mr. Franklin ended up being "political pals" with his son, but then due to egos or whatever, they became estranged from each other until the day he died. And never in his life did he spend any time with his daughter. He never spent enough time in the states to get to know her.

He also had a girlfriend on the side while married. So.....all that being said, he was not a person to be idolized. He was a great statesman and inventor, but as a terrific and loving person, he came up very short. He did not meet his responsibilities of being a husband and father. His family life, if that is what you want to call it, was pretty much non-existent.